Hello Random People,
Hope Everyone’s holidays were as blissful as they should be!
I’ve been meaning to write a post about opinions of family members and friends about your relationship, maybe this is the right time…
In order to have a good healthy relationship with your partner, I’m finding that one must not include everyone that they know into their problems. Those problems do not disappear as quickly as you make up with your woman, or man. You will still have that angry friend who will be spewing hurtful & hateful words even when you’re no longer mad at your partner. And that grudge holding family member? Nope, their thoughts about it aren’t leaving either. They will not let those issues go as easily because when you were hurt, they felt hurt too, which is only human nature as you are caring for someone you love.No one can be comfortable either and no one wants to walk into a room filled with hating individuals because of disagreements you and your spouse had previously. I have personally been in this situation too many times before. I was the person who needed to “vent” all the time because i felt like i was not being heard. I had to make some REAL realizations.
1. How can i want to be heard when I’m not even listening either?
2. Not every friend or family member has that listening unbiased ear that will give you sound advice.
3. 90-95% of the time, VENT to your man or woman…not whoever is near you. They are not in your relationship and probably did not get you to where you are in the present moment.
4. You just have to realize that misery loves company. Some people are going through so much in their life and are so unhappy which will make it appear like you need to be like them. Run far away from someone like this. They will drag you down, but when they get back up, your butt will still be down their struggling while they bask in the happiness that you could have tried to mend.
5. Make the change (whether it be venting your spouse, counseling, time alone), or keep it moving.
Hopefully everyone who is reading this will be in a fully committed relationship ,like a marriage at some point, and even in those you only need your God, yourself, and your man ,or woman. It’s okay to talk to a unbiased friend sometimes without purging detail for detail, but never forget who you really need to speak with. Only you and your partner can change what you do not agree with in YOUR relationship.
Peace and Blessings,
Random Mixed Chick